On Grown Man In Subway with food all up on his face

I hope to GOD this guy has had a vasectomy.  How do you make it to 35 and still not know how to chew your food?  You literally have a pickle on your forehead you asshole.

On Guy With Big Ears

Tiffany: (whispers to me) Omg that guy's ears are huge...
Josh: Well don't say it outloud then.  With those things he probably just heard you.

On This Girl at the Sandwich Shop Blinking too much.

If this chick blinks any more she's going to have lift off.

On misspelling the word "retarded"

Irony.

On Pumping your Breaks

Damn it's not a first date.  Just hit it.

On People Opposed to Arizona's new Law

I like how Obama makes it illegal to not have an insurance card and everyone is cool with it. But carrying the ID that proves who you are the person on that card upsets people.  lol


    I've been told so many times over the years that I need to start documenting some of the things that come out of my mouth. I decided to finally start doing it. I'll be updating often.

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